Onomewrites

Impacting Nations

MY WORSHIP PLAYLIST

Worship is something I enjoy doing, especially when I’m not in the best mood. It always makes me feel like I just slapped the devil in his face. Worship is my therapy when I’m sad, and even when I’m happy, it gives me this peace and joy I can’t explain.

I remember worshipping and praying one day, and the Lord said to me, “Whatever happens, always find your way back here” that day, I felt new, and I felt loved. On this journey of faith, there is a lot the Lord is teaching me, and I’m always excited to share the lessons.

You can’t get it wrong in the place of worship. When it gets tough and you don’t know what to do, enter into the place of worship, submit to His will and watch how He comes through for you.

These past months some songs have spoken to me in ways I’ve never imagined. These songs are my go-to songs, and each time I worship, I have my faith strengthened and renewed.

The songs are:

  1. Nobody by Tim Godfrey ft Ntonzo Mbambo
  2. Jireh by Maverick city &Elevation Music ft Chandler Moore and Naomi Raine
  3. You’re Gonna get the glory by Tasha Cobbs
  4. One moment by Freke Umoh
  5. Hymn Medley by Maveric city ft Chandler Moore
  6. Victory belongs to Jesus by Ric Hassani ft Called out music and Frank Edwards
  7. Yah by Dunsin Oyekan
  8. I’ll be here
  9. Isaiah song by Maverick city ft Chandler Moore
  10. Olorun Agbaye by Nathaniel Bassey ft Chandler Moore and Oba

Click play and enjoy a time of worship

CONCLUSION

When listening to these songs, let your faith be activated, key into the messages and watch how Papa comes to dine with you. Oh, don’t forget to go into His presence with a pen and a jotter. He is always ready to talk to you.

You can download each song by clicking the download icon by the side of each song

I love you.

Your friend and sister,

Onome.

FIVE LESSONS I LEARNT IN MY FIRST YEAR OF MARRIAGE

Hey Fam,

Yesterday was my wedding anniversary. Yeah, it’s been a whole year I came to give you the news of getting married, and it’s been a journey. Honestly, nothing has stretched me like marriage. I have grown, learned a lot, and unlearnt some things, and I’m still growing on this journey.

I want to share with you quickly five major lessons I’ve learned in my first year.

YOUR MARRIAGE IS WHAT YOU CALL IT

When I was getting married, I heard different things from different people. Everybody has an opinion to give newlyweds, which I think is not bad but you have to sieve what you hear. Some people told me the first year would be the hardest, and others said it would be easy. The people who said it would be hard have their reasons, and honestly, I fed on those words, and I found myself always afraid of what’s going to happen.

When we had no conflict, I was scared because I felt the peace was never going last. It took me a while to deal with this fear. I want to urge you if you are about to get married, protect your heart and declare what you want. I think the first year is the learning year, but at the same time, it can be sweet. The question is, what do you want?

I AM NOT A SUPERWOMAN

Ouch! This truth hurts. I grew up doing everything by myself, and it’s the reason I broke down quickly. Marriage is a partnership, and that is the whole point. After we got married, I noticed I was doing too much. I had a full-time job, a blog to run, a podcast, and other commitments, so I got tired quickly. All I had to do was ask for help. When I started asking my husband to help with some things, I felt better. I know you have been raised to be a home keeper, but you can’t do it all by yourself. It’s okay to ask for help. I find it easier when I’m cooking, and my husband is keeping me company. It lightens my burden. Women, it is okay to ask for help! You are not a superwoman.

MEN AND WOMEN COMMUNICATE DIFFERENTLY

You will learn this in marriage counseling, but the real deal happens when you enter into marriage. The way you communicate is different from your partner. I’m the one who wants to bear it all out, but my husband, on the other hand, wants to spend some time thinking about it before he voices out, so I find out that I get angry when he doesn’t tell me things on time. We had a talk about it, and we came to a middle ground, marriage is communication. Don’t expect your partner to communicate the same way you do. If you are not okay with anything, talk about it. Giving your partner silent treatment is not a wise decision. Talk about it.

DON’T TRY TO CHANGE YOUR PARTNER

This was a lesson I had to learn. For a long time, I wanted my husband to do things in my way. Let me give you an example. I believe in doing things ASAP, I don’t like it when decisions are taking a long time, but my husband, on the other hand, takes his time. He spends time analyzing and calculating the risks involved. This act would annoy me, but I noticed that he doesn’t like it when I forced him to make decisions on my terms. I had to sit down and understand the differences. Your partner cannot be you, so don’t force them to be like you. If you married yourself life would be boring so celebrate the differences.

YOU NEED JESUS

If you don’t remember anything, please do not forget this lesson. You cannot run marriage without God. You need the Holy Spirit. Forget about the paparazzi married people display on social media. It takes the help of God to keep a good home. You are two different people from different backgrounds trying to build a life together, so there would be frictions. We have had fights this first year that I thought would last for weeks but what we realize is that by the time we are on day two, the HolySpirit is dealing with us individually, and by the end of day two, we are apologizing and promising to do better.

CONCLUSION

Marriage is beautiful, and I can tell you that it’s fun, but the real deal is getting it right. Being on this journey with my partner has been blissful, and I can tell you that the wait is worth it. There are still good marriages, and yours would not be an exception.

I look forward to sharing and celebrating your love story.

I love you.

Your friend and sister,

Onome

see also: Our zero naira wedding

LETTER TO HOPE

Dear Hope,

As a little girl, Mama gave me lectures and sermons about you. She taught me about how important you are in everyone’s life. She said you are the one people hold on to for survival a lot of times. She also added that you had two siblings called Faith and Love, she said Love was the eldest, but I needed all three of you to survive, I remembered that sermon, and it became my mantra.

Growth happened, and the little girl became a teenager, life came at me, and I was so scared, I was scared to trust you because humans failed me and I felt you would too, but you did fail me, I held on for so long, but nothing happened, they said it was going to be better, but it wasn’t. Life dealt with me, and you didn’t save me, so I let go of you and your siblings.

Throwing you away became my greatest regret, the minute I kicked you out your rival took charge of my life, I can’t remember asking him to, but he did, and it almost ruined me. Depression took over, all I thought of was death, and I didn’t even know what to do so I resolved to tears and pains, and I wished I didn’t run from you, nobody could save me.

Fear crippled my life, Uncle Faith’s rival, and life wasn’t just worth living anymore. Still, in the middle of all of these, your brother Love found me. He looked for me, did all he could to rescue me from hurting myself. He came in a different package, I was so stubborn, yet he was patient, he was so persistent yet gentle, and because depression was gradually killing me, I succumbed to love, and my life received a revival.

Hope, I’m sorry I kicked you out, but I need you, I know Love will never leave me, but I have to keep working on my relationship with you and Faith, but it’s incredible to see that once I can work on my relationship with Love, you and Faith will be so natural. How I love your family.

I know it’s not going to be easy, even as a grown-up lady I still get scared about tomorrow, I sometimes worry about getting things right, I still get nervous I will mess things up and frustrate Love. Yet, Love said there is nothing I can do to push him away. I cried when he said that, so does that mean I have you and Faith for the rest of my life? That is such a great relief.

Life is always going to push me, challenges will come my way, friends will disappoint me, I will fight with my man, my parents, and siblings will get on my nerves, but I will choose you and your siblings over and over again, I will walk in Love, embrace you and keep Faith.

Hope, if there is one lesson the year 2020 taught me is that I need you to survive, you were my succour throughout the year.

I will remember Mama’s lecture because I can’t live life without you. I can’t run my marriage without you because there will always be challenges there, I can’t run my job without you because my boss will still want more from me, I can’t run my relationship with my friends without you because there will be issues, but I hold on to you.

With you and your siblings, life is worth living, and we can go to bed knowing that today may be challenging, but tomorrow is certainly going to better.

Thank you for being a constant support and strength!

I love you so much, please give my warm regards to Faith and Love, tell them they mean a lot to me, and one of these days I will write a note to them too.

Your buddy,

 Onome

CONCLUSION

The year 2020 tested me on so many levels, there were days I cried like a baby, and there were days filled with laughter, but each season taught me growth, perseverance, and God’s Love. I don’t know what this year brought for you but look at you, God kept you, and you survived!

2021 will bring marvellous testimonies.

Thank you for your Love and support!

I love you so much.

DEAR BELIEVER, REFUSE TO BE SILENCED

“For I, the Lord, love justice,

I hate robbery in the burnt offering;

And I will faithfully give them their recompense

And make an everlasting covenant with them.” (Isaiah 61:8)

It’s been days since the #endsars movement started. It’s been a season of liberation with the youths demanding for justice. What excites me about this movement is how young people of different ages, religion, beliefs and tribes put aside their differences to support one cause which is to put an end to police brutality in our nation Nigeria.

I am excited at what God is doing because this is a sign that there is hope for our dear nation Nigeria, it means my generation is awake and like the Israelites, we are ready to crush down Jericho. I have seen a lot of believers who have decided to be lackadaisical about this movement because we believe that grace covers us so we are safe.

I’m not disputing the fact that grace covers us but we owe the next generation a better legacy, we cannot inherit the silence of our fathers, Jesus died for all of us and its time for a revolution. God loves justice, isn’t that why he destroyed Pharaoh and the Egyptians because they refused to let His children go (Exodus 9:1).

The next question is, what can you do to lend your voice?

THINGS TO DO

PRAY:

“Then if my people who are called by my name will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and restore their land” (2 chronicles 7:14).

This is the first thing to do, God answers prayers and we can’t deny His love. There are lots of prayer walk in cities around you, look for the nearest one and join. This battle is of the lord and we are certain He will give us victory.

Intercessors this is the time to arise and call on God for intervention. Nigeria is our country and we must do the best we can for our home, we need to ask for mercy and speak peace into the land. Let’s use our authority to seek the father’s face.

Each time believers gather to pray; something happens and we can be a great spiritual support if we choose to pray.

PROPHESY:

I’ve heard people speak negative words, things like “Nobody can help Nigeria” “You are only wasting your time” as a believer we know that our God is an expert at impossibilities and Nigeria will not be an exemption.

Let’s decree over this nation that the #endsars movement will yield good results, that an end will come to brutality and senseless killings. Let’s call forth unity and that the eyes of every police officer are opened to know that we are not fighting against them but for them. Use your words to encourage and speak positivity.

PROTEST

Nobody is against you going out to protest. It is perfectly okay for believers to protest, it’s time to remove the sentiments and face the truth. You are a citizen of this nation and you pay tax so it is your right to demand justice. It is wrong to say believers cannot protest because we are covered, remember that Joshua went to battle with the Amalekites to take over the land the Lord promised the Israelites (Exodus 17:8-13). While you are going out to protest, stay safe and don’t fight. We are advocates of peace and don’t forget to shine your light.

USE YOUR GIFTS

Designers, programmers and content creators’ whatever gift you have let us use our gifts to promote the #endsars movement. This nation needs you right now and you can’t afford to fold your arms. Play your part, use your platforms and let us fight for the peace of this nation.

CONCLUSION

“On that day the LORD will shield those who live in Jerusalem, so that the feeblest among them will be like David, and the house of David will be like God, like the angel of the LORD going before them.” Zechariah 12:8

I am convinced that a new nation is arising, the lord is redeeming Nigeria and it’s time for the change we have all been praying for. We did not inherit the fear and silence of our fathers, we owe our children a better nation, we owe them a transformed nation and we owe them a legacy that they have a voice in Nigeria.

If you can’t be a Joshua that will go into battle then be a Moses holding the staff to help Joshua win the battle. Use your voice and let’s demand justice!

Shall we pray?

Nigeria,

We speak peace to your borders

We pray increase

We pray for passionate leaders

We ask for mercy Lord

We ask for peace and justice

We ask that an end has come to bloodshed of innocent lives

We pray you are an enviable nation

We pray your light shines for all nations to see

Everyone protesting is safe

An end has come to brutality and victimization

(Amen)

Dear Believer, refuse to be silenced the next generation is counting on you. Arise and let’s put an end to injustice in Nigeria.

Image source: Akorede Olaitan for Upfront studios

OPEYEMI: BEAUTY FOR ASHES

“To console those who mourn in Zion, To give them beauty for ashes, The oil of joy for mourning, The garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; That they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the LORD, that He may be glorified.” Isaiah 61: 3 NKJV

Writing Opeyemi’s story gives me bittersweet memories. We were friends from afar before we got close in 2018 when a mutual friend recommended her services. She became my hairstylist and we got really close.

I always knew there was more to her, so when she called me last month and said, “Onome, I want to share my story”, I knew the time had come. Listening to her while she shared her story, gave me a lot of emotional chills. I cried and wondered but at the end of the story, something stood out, and that is the fact that “God is good and His mercies endureth forever”

I want you to read this story and see a woman who was broken but not despaired, struck down but not destroyed. A woman who went through the fire but came out stronger, one who God loves.

Grab your bottle of orange juice and let’s meet Opeyemi Oguntimeyin nee Olagunju.

THE INTERVIEW

Onome: Tell us a little about yourself

Opeyemi: I’m Opeyemi Oguntimeyin nee Olagunju. I’m a businesswoman, I love money, please. I’m married to an amazing man who is a pastor and I am a full-time child of God

Onome: What was growing up like?

Opeyemi: Wasn’t fun, had so many memories but looking back I think everything worked together for good. I started looking up to men early to meet my needs, my parents were not poor; we were comfortable. When a need arose and my parents could not meet up, I had a man I could call that would meet that need.

Onome: If I may ask, when did you start looking up to men to meet your needs?

Opeyemi: I lost my virginity to rape. There was a young guy around my compound, who kept having sex with me at a young age; that was when I was within age 11 and 15. I became wild and started going out with guys when I was 15. Within age 15 and 17, I had slept with about 10 guys and three married men, just to get money. In fact not just for my needs but to also help others.

Onome: (At this point I was crying) I’m so sorry you had to go through that but would you say you were addicted to sex?

Opeyemi: Yes I was, couldn’t go a week without sex. Along the line I got pregnant by one of my older boyfriends, I tried getting rid of the pregnancy but was unable to do that. That was how I had my first son. It was a disgrace on my part then but after giving my life to Christ, it became a blessing to me and my family.

Onome: How did your parents react when they found out you were pregnant?

 Opeyemi: Hmmm…my mum, a mother I can’t trade for anything, accepted me with all her heart, but my wonderful dad, being disappointed in me at first, was so bitter and he angrily told me to move to the man’s house.

Onome: What did you do at this point?

Opeyemi: My mom kept on pleading that he should let me stay. I kept crying because I didn’t know what to do.

Onome: Did people stigmatise, did your friends laugh at you?

Opeyemi: Yes, a lot of them. In fact, I almost cried my eyes out.

Onome: So sorry. Did the father of the baby accept responsibility?

Opeyemi: The father of the baby accepted the responsibility and was providing what he could afford for a particular period, but suddenly he stopped. When I realized, I told him I couldn’t marry him. My sister, that was just the tip of the iceberg oo! There’s a lot more to say.

Onome: (Sigh) We are here for the story. Please take your time (At this point we were both getting emotional).

Opeyemi: I started sleeping with different men and boys after I stopped breastfeeding my son. There were times I slept with two or three men in a day, I masturbated and In fact, I tried lesbianism once. I just couldn’t stop myself. I travelled to different places like Lagos, Abuja, Minna and a lot more to meet with men I had never seen before.

Onome: Did you at any point, abort a pregnancy?

Opeyemi: The first time I aborted, it was painful. I even landed in the hospital but at a point, I got used to it until Christ himself saved me. I had nothing less than 10 abortions, 6 D &Cs and the rest with drugs. I went for nursing training which exposed me to all the drugs I could use instead of going through the stress of D&C. Onome Jesus loves me, that’s all I can say.

Onome: How and when did you get born again?

Opeyemi: I love to answer that question with a smile because that was how I experienced a sudden change in my life. I got born of Christ totally, and finally in the year 2017, with my husband’s help, I received the baptism of the Holy Ghost. It happened through a phone conversation also, all just within a space of three months.

Onome: How did you meet your husband?

Opeyemi:  I have been waiting for this to come. I met my husband at my brother’s wedding. I was to serve his food that day, he appreciated me and my stature. That was how the friendship started, but it was just a lustful friendship. We had to break up our friendship for a while, I guess it’s the Lord’s doing, in order to make the relationship a pure one because we were already lusting after each other, but we didn’t date. We came in contact again in the first month in January of 2017.

Onome:  How did you guys start dating?

Opeyemi: We were just discussing on phone that day and he asked me a strange question, “Can you marry a pastor?” I never wanted to marry a pastor but I told him to let the will of God be done. I was not born again then oo! but I was tired of the promiscuous lifestyle. So my behaviour had reduced to the minimum, you know as a normal worldly person, one boyfriend at a time. So he told me to go and pray about it, which I did but what I did not understand, was how someone would have peace about an issue when you are not saved? Because I had peace to go with him when I prayed about him that was how we started.

 He gave me different books and asked me to read the Bible every day, starting from the new testament and explain what I read in the book, then take pictures and send it to him every day. Until one day, I told him I masturbated and he asked if I have given my life to Christ, I said yes but no more in Christ; so he led me to Christ that day. Onome, 2017 was the year the Lord changed my story.

Onome: After you got born again, did you still have sex?

Opeyemi: Yes I did but with a man. Truth is, addiction is not something you just stop, it’s gradual. I had sex four or five times before my wedding.

Onome: Was it with your husband?

Opeyemi: My husband fulfilled his promise to abstain from sex until we got married but I did not. I had sex anytime I needed something urgently and it was delaying.

Onome: Was your husband aware you did this?

Opeyemi: I confessed to my husband and he forgave me. Each time I messed up I felt bad but I was relieved when I confessed to him and we moved on.

Onome: When would you say you stopped?

Opeyemi: I just knew it was gradual but a few months to my wedding I stopped totally. I honestly think I’m a product of grace. God loves me and He is a merciful father. I saw God’s love through my husband. I kept messing up but he chose to stay with me. We got married 22nd September 2018 and God gave us a son in June 2020. Like I said I’m a product of God’s love.

Onome: Thank you for sharing your story Opeyemi. Hope you don’t mind me interviewing your husband for a follow up of this story?

Opeyemi: He is looking forward to it. He was the one who encouraged me when I got the nudge to share my story.

Onome: Thank you!

CONCLUSION

“But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!)” Ephesians 2: 4-5.

Opeyemi’s story felt like I was listening to Hosea and Gomer’s story in real life. It’s a story of God’s love! I don’t how far you think you have gone but our father is rich in Mercy and love. He is waiting for you and just like Opeyemi, he will give you beauty for ashes.

Ps: Fam, I would be interviewing Opeyemi’s husband very soon for a follow up of this story. Stay tuned!

RELATED: JEMIMA: GETTING OFF THE SHACKLES OF ADDICTION

You have my love,

Onome

DAVID AND VICTORIA: WHEN GOD WRITES THE LOVE STORY

There is nothing regular about this couple; theirs is a story of love, patience, God’s intervention and grace. It is not just exciting but it is also a beautiful story.

David and Victoria are my friends and their love would make you jealous. The way David watches out for Victoria and the way he protects her, is something I admire. The interesting thing about them is their friendship. Victoria is the shy one while David is quite outspoken. It’s a perfect blend but what amazes me the most, is how they always look out for each other.

Beyond love and affection, is the commitment they share and how passionate they are about purpose. Victoria has been a great helpmeet and I’ve seen how she supports and encourages David when he goes out to minister or when he holds his programme.

Another gist about this couple is that they share the same birthdate and today is their birthday.

Interviewing this couple was a great experience because they were both real and their story is one you will learn from.

It is time to meet this beautiful couple, so grab your bottle of orange juice and get a slice of cake to step down with, while you read how God wrote Victoria and David’s love story.

Onome:  Tell us something about you and what makes you special?

Victoria:  Everything about me is special, Onome and it’s because God is my creator.  He is the most special person on earth, and He created me, thus, I am special.

I am Victoria Adeola Ibitoye (nee Ajayi), I am a child of God and an Accountant by profession, trained at the Federal Polytechnic, Offa. I served in Rivers State. I love reading, dancing, travelling and I also love music.

David: The scriptures from A to Z testify to it about me. I am special because God says so. After all, why will Christ die for a nobody?

I am David Iyanuoluwa Ibitoye. I am saved and I love Jesus more than my breath. I want to die loving Him. I am an alumnus of the great University of Ilorin; the Better By Far University, and the Nigerian Baptist Theological Seminary, Ogbomoso. Needless to say, I am a pastor. I got born again in the year 2009. I love music, reading, travelling (not on Nigerian roads though), gisting and meditating. I’m a lazy writer but oftentimes I stumble on writing and it comes out fine…I guess.

Onome: Tell us about your waiting season

Victoria: God helped me during my waiting season because I decided from the beginning, not to play around. I wanted my first love to be my husband, and God did just that for me. Not that I didn’t have suitors, some of them looked so much “like it”, but God helped me out.

At a time, I looked at many of my friends getting engaged and I was just there, but the Holy Spirit kept encouraging me to wait and I did just that. Then God showed me, love, by giving me the best man on earth as my husband.

David: Well, when I was single, I was helped by God. I had a breakup as a teenager. I was the one who broke up. I regret that decision because I knew I hurt the lady. So, I decided never to enter into any other relationship unsure. I promised myself before God that my next girlfriend would be my wife, and God helped me.

Onome: How did you meet your husband/wife and how did you know he/she was the one?

Victoria: On the 3rd of August 2014 in church, after the Sunday school class he took, he asked me to please wait behind to see him, for an important discussion after service, which I did. Interestingly, I wasn’t expecting it. I thought he wanted to discuss some “Kingdom assignment” with me (not as if toasting me was not kingdom assignment though), to my amazement, he told me he would like to walk life’s journey with me, and that was it. He did not over-spiritualize the proposal, he didn’t try to impress me or sweep me off my feet with some spiritual talk. He just said, “I love you sister Vic, and I will like you to be my wife.” What impressed me the most was that his words were brief and straight to the point. With a little sprinkle of arrogance which I enjoyed though, he asked if I would like to be disturbed for my answer or if I would just get back to him whenever I was ready. I loved that. I told him I prefer not to be disturbed.

Actually, immediately he came, I had this inner peace in my spirit man, compared to what I had experienced with other suitors. But you know, as a lady, I didn’t want to rush into my response like that, so I told him I would get back to him, and I did on the 1st of October 2014 after being fully convinced by the Holy Spirit.

David: Actually, I have received her since 2010. That year, I was working a menial job and came home hungry one day. I was scrambling for what to eat at home but couldn’t find any. So I went to my mom’s WMU bag (Women Missionary Union, it’s the women arm of the Baptist denomination) for WMU biscuits and the likes and was disappointed again. While searching inside the bag, I saw a picture of a prison evangelism team of my church and saw my fiancée among the prison evangelists.

Then I clearly heard the Holy-Ghost say (so audibly, I had to turn back to check if someone was behind me) “That is your wife” and that was it. Though I ignored for some time because I wasn’t at first pleased with it, God had to teach me how to love His will, and if I have to choose over and over again, I would still choose my Victoria. In 2014 after having been fully convinced by the Lord and just after graduating Unilorin, I went to deliver my manifesto to her after a Sunday service. Three months later she said yes.

Onome: How was it like preparing for your wedding?

Victoria: Hmmm… I would say interesting but ours was a testimony so I would say God did it.

David: God gave us a word in Matthew 22:2 “The kingdom of heaven is like unto a certain king, which made a marriage for his son”… That was it. God told us in the order of heaven, the Father makes marriages for His children, so He began to give us specific instructions on what to do. He sent many angels in human form to us. For example, when it was time to get introduced and it was looking impossible, it was one of my Pastors, Reverend Shola Sangoleye, who advised us to just pick a day and trust God. We chose November 30 and God made it work. Then we were left with the wedding date. We found it hard to conclude on a day, then God just told us to pick by faith. We settled eventually for May 30, then coronavirus came. We decided we were not going to shift the day for anything. God granted our hearts’ desires and it worked out just fine. To God be the glory!

Onome: What is the place of God in choosing a partner?

Victoria: God is the author of marriage. Any relationship that will not become a snare must be God’s idea. Even with the partner that God gives you, there are lines to straighten out, not to talk of jumping into it all by yourself…

David: The thing is that no man knows himself fully, not to talk of another person. Even if you court a lady for 20 years, you still don’t get to know an inch of what she is. So, why not take the short-cut; go through her Maker who knows all about her? He calibrated her being so He is the best person to tell you if it is safe to marry some lady or not. Furthermore, God knows your capacity as a person. He gives you the partner that your faith and desire can walk with. No one is perfect, but if you choose without His leading, the probability to choose the one your faith cannot walk with is incalculable. Thus, God is not to be an after-thought after choosing someone, but the One Who directs your heart into what to do. Not all good, godly, born-again ladies are right for one o! so we must not be fooled into gambling with our marital lives.

Onome: so David and Victoria, How did you keep yourselves while dating? How did you abstain from sex, what was your secret?

David: My wife is the best person to answer this

Victoria: (smiles) Honestly, God kept us. We were determined from the onset to keep ourselves. Our father in the Lord, Reverend Paul Debo Adeyemi told us when we just started, that the lady should be at the driver’s side. I sat comfortably at the driver’s side ooo! Our Reverend further advised us that whenever we were alone, we should beware of tempting situations. We were able to achieve this. Whenever I go visiting my single fiance, I would sleepover at someone else’s place instead of his, because we were wise enough not to trust ourselves prodigally. Sex is worth waiting for. Thus, it is unwise to rush into it.

Onome: Hmmm.. Thanks, guys. The last question. What’s your advise to singles who are waiting?

Victoria: I will put it in one sentence and that sums it up; It is good to wait for God’s time because His time is the best.

David:Firstly, relax! Build a relationship with God first. Don’t start emergency prayer life when you’re looking for a partner. The God you cannot hear when you’re deciding which cloth to wear, you can never hear when deciding whom to marry.

John Piper’s daughter once said, “A girl should get so lost in God that a man has to know God to find her.” That ought to be everyone’s maxim. Just get lost in loving God, you will be found by a lover of God.

Onome: It has been a great time with you guys. Thank you for your time, we do appreciate you.

David and Victoria: Onome,  It is an honour, we appreciate the opportunity to share our story!

Onome: Oh, happy birthday guys, God bless and increase you on all sides.

David and Victoria: Onome, we appreciate. Amen. Thank you.

CONCLUSION

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart;  do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do,  and he will show you which path to take”. (Proverbs 3:5-6) NLT

There are days it gets overwhelming, I know being single is not fun when you see everyone around you getting engaged or married but God is not done with you. Let this Love story encourage you in your wait, I’ve known Victoria for more than 15 years and I know her to be so committed and faithful to God’s work and God blessed her with the best.

David had to submit his will and desire to God and God the perfect fit for his purpose and assignment. He had to allow God to teach him how to love this special woman. David has been my friend for more than 10 years and each time we talk about love and marriage, he was never worried because he believed God had his best interest at heart.

You think God is late, He is not. He is busy writing your love story, be patient and trust His timing.

I look forward to sharing your story.

PS: Don’t forget to show our couple some love in the comment section, it’s their birthday let’s wish them well.

You have my love,

Onome.

CONDEMNED TO DIE

“He isn’t here! He is risen from the dead, just as he said would happen. Come, see where his body was lying.” (Mathew 28:6) NLT

Life feels so hard, nothing is working and I just want to die.

Those were my words, I said that for so many years. I thought of suicide a lot of times but I never dared to try it, I was thirsty for affection and I desperately needed someone to love me. I cried myself to sleep so many nights and maybe no one loves me after all.

The church was somewhere I found myself because I had no choice, when I heard people share testimonies about God and how he spoke to them, I was jealous because I wanted what they had.

I read the bible every night because momma would ask if I had my quiet time, I enjoyed reading the stories other parts were boring as far as I was concerned. Where was this God who did all these things recorded in the bible? I had a lot of questions but who would answer them.

That was my story that was me. The one who didn’t deserve love and mercy, the one condemned to die. The devil reminded me of my pains but all Christ had to do was show me Calvary where he bled for me. He brought me freedom and grace.

Thank God the story did not end at Calvary, he was taken down to the tomb and on the third day, He resurrected!!!

Condemned to die

I can’t contain my joy that he arose. He went to hell and fought for my freedom, he defeated death so that I won’t die, he defeated sicknesses and diseases that I might live in total health. He took the fall just for me.

It took me years to understand what love meant and when I did my life took a new turn. I could understand those testimonies I was jealous about because when you come in contact with the father of light you radiate his light.

Today, all you have to do is thank God that Jesus has risen!

Your salvation is eternal.

CONCLUSION

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth, you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33) NLT

I understand what pain means, I know what it means to desperately want approval but the truth is you have been looking for answers in the wrong places. Love has been knocking and all you have to do is open the door.

No one can love you the way Christ loves you. He paid the price for our freedom, he purchased us with His blood and gave us victory.

Let me end this article with the lyrics of my favourite hymn.

The strife is o’er, the battle done by Francis Pott

  1. The strife is o’er, the battle done;

The victory of life is won;

The song of triumph has begun:

Alleluia!

  • The pow’rs of death have done their worst;

But Christ their legions has dispersed;

Let shouts of holy joy outburst:

Alleluia!

  • The three sad days are quickly sped;

He rises glorious from the dead;

All glory to our risen Head:

Alleluia!

  • He closed the yawning gates of hell;

The bars from heav’n’s high portals fell;

Let hymns of praise His triumphs tell:

  1. Alleluia!

Culled from (https://library.timelesstruths.org/music/The_Strife_Is_Oer_the_Battle_Done/)

When you are searching for love, just look at Calvary!

I recently started a podcast called “Naked” it centres on relationships and inspirations. Check it out and let me know what you think, click here to listen to my latest podcast and if you would love to download click here.

Thank you, family!!!!!!

You have my love.

Onome.

OUR ZERO NAIRA WEDDING

I almost forgot I promised God, that if He sponsors our wedding, I would share the testimony. When my husband reminded me last week, I knew the time had come to share our wedding testimony.

It was my birthday and I was meditating with the father asking Him what He would have me do this New Year and he said marriage was the next assignment. I was genuinely surprised because I felt I wasn’t ready and kept asking myself where the money for the wedding ceremony would come from. That same day, my lover proposed and I knew God meant business. After the Euphoria of the proposal, I had to ask my lover how we were going to do the wedding because there was no money anywhere and we had no rich uncles to run to.

It wasn’t just that, my lover had taken a loan from a microfinance bank about four months ago that he was still repaying and it didn’t make any sense that we would choose to get married when he was not done paying the loan but all that mattered to us was that God had given a go ahead and we were ready to obey.

After the date was chosen, we started praying and each time we prayed God kept speaking to us that he was with us. I panicked, I was scared but each time I prayed I felt this peace that passes human understanding.

Three months to the wedding, it wasn’t looking like it; then the Holy Spirit started teaching me about confessions. He told me to write what I wanted for the wedding. He also gave me Philippians 4:19 (MSG) and I went ahead to write my confessions. I started making the confessions morning and night. Each time I made the confessions I felt this new level of confidence. Two months to the wedding, it still wasn’t looking like it. Our invitation cards were not ready and it felt as though the wedding would be postponed.

My faith began to shake but my lover kept encouraging me. Watching him make plans even without the finances boosted my faith; so I took the backseat to see what God would do. I remember having a vigil with my close friends I call sisters and we prayed together. A word of prophecy came out that God would supply all my needs and I should just relax. I started praising God knowing He would come through.

We were preparing to travel home for our counselling session when the Lord told me to sow a seed. I didn’t feel like it because I already had a budget for the money at hand and as at that time, I had not bought anything and the wedding was just in two months. I called my husband and he told me to go ahead with the seed that if we wanted God to sponsor the wedding, then we have to be obedient 100%. I sowed the seed in faith and by January God started coming through.

The finances started coming in and for every monetary gift we received, we paid our tithes and in some cases, we even paid 20%. It felt stupid but since we wanted God to be the sponsor, we had to trust Him completely. Our invitations came out a month to our wedding and honestly we still had a lot to do. Needs kept coming and God kept providing. The wedding day was getting closer and God kept sending men our way to help us. Our parents kept sharing testimonies every day of how God was sending men to help and support them, they would tell us how this person dropped this and how that person donated that. I was just so dumbfounded because indeed God came through.

Two days to the wedding, my mum called me to tell me that we were yet to buy drinks. I was worried but I knew God that started the good work will complete it so I went on to sort some other needs and I completely forgot but God did it again.

My mum was telling me after the wedding how God showed up that He didn’t just provide the drinks, there was even more than enough funds to sort out every other need.

It still felt like a dream. God had gone ahead of us to make all the crooked paths straight. He made the two days glorious and He alone deserves all the glory. I also want to say a big thank you to all our friends who decided to take up the ministry of intercession; we could feel your prayers and a lot of them also made sacrifices. We had friends who gave their all, cancelled all their appointments and travelled from Thursday till Sunday. We love you guys passionately.

We enjoyed the gift of men and God showed Himself faithful indeed.

CONCLUSION

“God is not a man that He should lie, Nor the son of man that He should repent.

Has He said, and will He not do it? Or has He spoken and will He not make it good and fulfil it?” (Numbers 23:19) Amplified bible

Planning a wedding for us was a step of faith; all we did was obey God. What is that assignment God is asking you to do or is He even telling you to get married but the present circumstances does not look like it?

Our wedding is proof that God never fails. Our resources were not enough but he multiplied our little and gave us abundance. The journey of faith requires obedience and complete trust in God knowing that He will do what He says.

If your wedding is around the corner and you are trusting God please don’t give up and at the same time don’t try to impress anyone. I tried my best not to put my husband under any pressure because I didn’t want him angry and cranky after the wedding.

We planned with what we had and God surpassed our imaginations. I don’t know what you are trusting God for but let our testimony be a proof that there is a God who never fails and with Jesus in your boat, you can smile at the storm. When it feels tough, keep praising and dancing, that weapon confuses the enemy.

God never fails.

If you missed our love story click here to read it.

You have our love!

Onome and Daniel

OUR PRE-WEDDING SHOOT

When Love happens you can’t deny and Let’s just say Love happened to me!

our pre-wedding shoot will definitely have you smiling, the wait is always worth it.

Enjoy our pictures and click here to read our love story


the chara wedding

The interesting part of the shoot is that we had fun!

the chara wedding
The chara wedding
the chara wedding

credits

Photography: @upfrontphotography

Makeup:@arikeglamhouse

White dress: @the7thbrooche

black dress: @bodacouture

suit and shirt: @xclusive_bbacouture

LOVE SO DIVINE: THE CHARA WEDDING

Hi family,

Forgive me, I know it has been a while.  I have been up to a number of things; reason I’ve been AWOL.

I have got news!

Your baby girl is getting married!!!

I am about to give you all the juicy details of our love story.

HOW WE MET

I took a decision to be single until the Lord sends my man (see my book, ‘Single Without Wrinkle’, for the full details). I wasn’t ready for a relationship, I was just enjoying my waiting season. During that period, I had been praying for a job. I finally got invited for an interview in one of the companies I applied to. The D-Day came and I aced the interview. I got called to resume work on a Tuesday morning. Upon my arrival on resumption day, I was asked to wait for the HR; that was when I met Daniel.

While waiting for the HR, this handsome dark-skinned young man walked up to me and said ‘hello’ amidst smiles. Although I wasn’t friendly, he however went on to introduce himself with the smile sculpted on his face (oh! he had such a cute smile). I told him my name and mentioned I was there to see the HR.

The HR finally arrived and guess what? I got sent back home because I was wearing a jean (the tomboy in me decided to embarrass me that day). I resumed the next morning, officially dressed and who did I meet….again? Daniel! As usual, he smiled and this time around, I smiled back as I was in a better mood. I overheard him talking about a Lecrae concert and how he didn’t want to miss the programme. In the course of the conversation, he mentioned being a member of Covenant Christian Center. That was all I needed to hear as I had just recently started listening to Pastor Poju and looked forward to being under his ministration live.

I asked for his number in a bid to go to church with him on Sunday and that was how we got talking. We went to church together as planned and became good friends. We talked about the bible and sometimes prayed together, all I saw in him was a “brother”.

I don’t know how it happened but I knew I started developing feelings for my so called ‘brother.’ I rejected it. I even took it a step further by praying and fasting. I kept telling God to remove the feelings but the more I prayed, the more it grew. Eventually, I had to call my spiritual father who told me to stop fighting but surrender it back to God.

I couldn’t run away because we worked in the same company and that was also a reason why I didn’t want the feelings to grow. I didn’t want to date someone I would see every day. I started avoiding him but he would always come around. One day, he told me we needed to talk.

We agreed to meet at Coldstone creamery. That day, he said to me  “Onome Omodara you are a treasure, you are like that bible passage that says a man sells all he has just to buy the treasure, but Onome I need time” I can’t forget those words. If you have read ‘There was a girl’, you will understand why those words meant a lot to me. I got home and cried. No one had ever said that to me. I had been told I am smart, beautiful, and intelligent but treasure? That hit me.

On the 2nd of May 2018, he officially asked me out. He didn’t ask me to be his girlfriend; he told me to be his wife. I was shocked and kept wondering what he saw in me. I told him to give me a month and he never pressured me. I prayed and waited for confirmation. I wasn’t ready to go through another cycle of heartbreak so I wanted to be sure.

On the 29th of May 2018, I said yes to him because it felt so right; I was at peace. Everything the Lord had said to me during my waiting season was apt when we started dating.

Daniel was intentional about our relationship; his love for me was so obvious. He was always willing to make sacrifices. There were days I thought we would break up but he would always say to me “Onome, I am not loving you by my own strength, mine would fail but God is my strength”. Daniel has been my safe place. Challenges have come our way but this man stood by me. This man prays with me and for me. He believes in my vision. He is God sent!

THE PROPOSAL

It was my birthday and my boss had told me she was throwing a birthday dinner for me and I should invite my close friends (I was surprised but happy to have a party). The day came and I saw my sister from Ibadan at the dinner; she appeared like a thief in the night (Fam, I was surprised). My friends came around and we were really having fun.

The waiter came in and said I had a special order, I opened and it was a ring! I wanted to run away (where was I running to sef?) The man of my dreams went down one knee asking me to marry him.

It was surreal. It showed that the wait is always worth it.

I have said enough.

 I interviewed my man and he has something to tell you

Enjoy

Tell us something about yourself

I am a graduate of computer science from the great Tai Solarin University of Education. Obviously I’m a Christian (smile). I am the first born from a family of four. I am passionate about Christ, my career and whatever I set my mind to do. I am a focused and purpose driven person with great leadership capacity. I see myself as a servant-leader as I enjoy taking up responsibilities irrespective of any position I am in.

At what point were you sure Onome was the one?

The chara wedding

(Deep sigh!) Well, it’s not like I heard a voice from heaven or something “spectacular” just like the days of Adam (smile), when something is right, you just know; the spirit bears witness remember. I don’t mean to sound too spiritual but pardon me; that is my default. Like the saying goes “Opposite attracts”. Onome is a “wokilumo” kinda person to put it in English, you will always notice her when she enters a room as oppose to my kinda nature; I am a reserved person. So I saw in her a woman that together we can do great things for Christ.

Onome is outspoken without being rude and very intelligent. Since men will always look at the outward, Onome is beautiful to behold and young at heart. Above all, I saw in Onome a woman that can help “womb” a vision and birth great dreams. A woman strong in the things that I seemed to be weak in.

What makes Onome special to you as a person?

(Deep breath) Permit me to keep the details to myself (smiles). But really, when you truly love someone you may not have a “special” reason for loving him/her. You just “apape” (add them together) them. Sometimes what makes somebody special to you could be the strength they exhibit that wowed your weakness. Many ladies have done wonderful things for me but the core of who she is, outclassed them all!

How do you feel about getting married?

CAPITAL MIXED FEELINGS (laughs) but I look forward to it.

What’s your most exciting memory about her?

The one I am yet to experience with her because every moment with her is a blessing.

THE CHARA WEDDING

We decided to use the chara wedding as our hashtag because we wanted a word that depicted exactly how we felt and “JOY” was the perfect word. Chara is a Greek word that means Joy.

CONCLUSION

“He hath made everything beautiful in his time” (Ecclesiastes 3:11a)

God is very intentional and each time I look at Daniel I am just reminded of God’s love. People have asked me how I feel about getting married and all I can say is “I am grateful”. If you know my story you will understand that God is faithful.

I don’t know how you feel right now but I need you to know that God has not forgotten you. Your marriage is going to happen and it’s going to be a testimony!

I look forward to sharing your story.

You have my love.

Onome.