Writing for me is beyond a hobby. It gives me great pleasure and more so fulfilling when people send me feedback about how my writing has helped them. However, there were times when I did not feel like writing. What happens when the one major thing that makes me happy feels like a strange place?
These past few weeks have been quite challenging. I was dealing with a major writer’s block and not just that; nothing made sense to me. I felt like I was running on an empty tank and it became crazier when I couldn’t even pray.
The fact that God loves me was not in doubt but then, it felt like He was so far. I could feel Him all around but I needed more than just a feeling. I had a lot of questions to ask and I knew He had so much to say to me but I wasn’t ready to listen.
It’s in all of these I got to understand, that God surrounds us with the best people. While I was being so grumpy and angry, my significant other just decided to be so patient. He listened as I kept ranting. His presence is a deep assurance of God’s love.
If God could give me this man, then He surely loves me. Even in the midst of love and pampering, there was a vacuum that nobody could fill. There was a longing in my heart that needed satisfaction.
The journey felt so long and I was getting tired. The truth is, I felt like I was becoming invisible and because I had writer’s block I felt I was not functioning in purpose anymore but what I forgot was that God had to take me through a process and I must be willing to wait.
It wasn’t until I found my way back to the father; the one whose arms are always open wide to welcome me home in love, the one who would never give up on me. I cried my eyes out as I asked him to fill the longing in my heart, I asked him for strength because my own strength had failed.
I don’t know what your own story is, I don’t know the pains you are feeling right now. Yours might be a loss or a big failure and just like me you have been seeing God doing it for others and you are asking the same question “God, when?” “When will you answer me?”
“Be strong. Take courage. Do not be intimidated. Don’t give them a second thought because God, your God, is striding ahead of you. He’s right there with you. He won’t let you down; He won’t leave you.” (Deuteronomy 31:6) MSG.
Your waiting season is like being in the wilderness; it is not going to last forever. In the middle of the storm, God is right there with you. He has promised not to let you down and you can count on Him not to fail you.
When you decide to leave your challenges at the feet of the father, He will give you peace that passes all understanding. It was after I had cried out to the father that I found peace. I am at this phase of my life, where I am at peace in spite of all that is going on around me because I am certain that the father would always come through.
I listened to a sermon that helped my faith and strength. I believe it’s going to be of great help to you too. It is by Pastor Mike Todd. The title is Peace under Pressure.
Press play and listen
You are not alone and you will come out of this stronger and better.
I love you!
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Your friend and sister,