Forgive me for taking a break. I know it has been a while but I can assure you that it is all for good. I have been learning, unlearning and relearning but thank you for sticking with me and cheering me on. You are more than amazing.
There was a time in my life when I made relationship my idol. I longed for closure. I irrationally hoped that a man would love me with all my baggage. I was not interested in making any attempt at self-development. All that mattered to me was being in a relationship. Hence, I became desperately obsessed.
I was told that God is the answer, so I intensified my prayers; in hopes that God would bring me a good man. Perhaps if I became a good Christian, I would attract a good man. This became my idol. I was desperately aching for a genuine relationship but I was the obstacle.
I had a lot of issues I needed to deal with. I had secrets I was not ready to share or come to terms with; rather, I expected a good man to show up like a knight in shining armour and fix my problems by the wave of his sword.
I was tired of making mistakes. I was tired of being broken and dejected. Coming to God meant I had to stop idolizing relationships and allow Him be my lover and best friend.
May I be completely honest with you???
Letting go was hard but I knew without a doubt, that God loves me. I had to come to the realization that I was idolizing relationships. I was overwhelmed with the need to be in a relationship that I had forgotten how to be single. I had forgotten how to live.
The day I handed over my relationship to God, I knew I had come to a place of rest. I was at peace with myself and my status. I became genuinely happy for my friends who were getting engaged or married.
READ ALSO: SINGLE AND SATISFIED
Many of us have idolized relationships in our hearts. We are so obsessed about getting married that we do not care how it happens but hey, you need to relax. God wants us to know Him first. We expect our spouses to fix us but God is the perfect fixer.
Many of us need to come a place of being satisfied with God. When you understand that God is enough, you will be at rest. Life is not a journey you want to leave to chance, we live by faith every day.
“Make God the utmost delight and pleasure of your life, and He will provide for you what you desire the most. Give God the right to direct your life and as you trust Him along the way you will find He pulled it off perfectly!” (Psalm 37: 4-6) TPT.
I have come to love this scripture because each time I study it, I find the love of God being expressed. God wants the best for you. He wants you to be in a good relationship and have a good, very good life. Until we trust Him, we will keep taking wrong turns.
When you are single and in love with God, you will be at peace. When your friends are getting engaged or married, you would not be jealous or bitter but genuinely happy for them, knowing with assurance, that yours is on the way.
Many of us need to come to a place of intimacy and fellowship with God. When we are lost in Him, we can trust that He will grant our heart desires. God is the king of surprises. Give Him your all and watch Him come through for you.
There was a video I saw, which completely brought me to total surrender and is a great reminder that God is real. I hope this video ignites a fire in your Spirit.
I would also like to encourage you to watch the crazy faith series by Pastor Mike Todd on Youtube, your faith will be strengthened.
I love you!
Your friend and sister,