Onomewrites

Impacting Nations

LETTER TO MY FUTURE HUSBAND

Dear Future Husband,

I prayed for you this morning. I asked God to watch over you as you go through this day. I told Him to grant you wisdom in the pursuit of your dreams and to work on you while we wait to become one.

I am the definition of a Proverbs 31 woman in the flesh; did I just write that? That is a lie: I am still growing into a completely balanced woman. The truth is, I still make silly mistakes and my mum still reminds me that I will get married soon, so I need to be better. Another thing is, God is not done with me yet.

Baby, I know you are not perfect either so we can use our imperfection to build a marriage that is beautiful! I want you to know that your past does not matter because Christ already forgave you; so I won’t hold your past against you and I hope you can do the same when it comes to mine.

I know you are the Ephesians 5 man: a man who yearns for the father, so I am confident that you will lead our family in the way of the Lord. You see, I know people have different opinions about me; some think I am proud, others think I am talkative, some even think I play too much, others just think I am secretive, while some think I am a flirt, but I know you are the best person to tell the world who I really am.

Baby, I know you are a man who will support and encourage my dreams and with you, my dreams can only get multiplied. I am also willing to carry your vision so that together, we can fulfil God’s mandate and purpose for our lives and relationship.

You have been given grace for this journey and when we are together, we will create magic and make our Father proud. I am not like the other women you have met: I am different, always ready to learn and eager to grow. I have been in different situations, met some bad eggs, but I am grateful because they have taught me to appreciate and love you better.

I am coming like a child; humble and open to learning. I am also coming like a mature and experienced woman, to work with you in building a great home. Someday, I will write books and dedicate them to you and our children. I will write about our marriage, to help inspire the next generation.

Together, we will take Jesus around the world and show people that good marriages still exist. I know we will have beautiful and smart children who we will raise in the way of the Lord.

Dear future husband, I look forward to the day I will look into your eyes and make that vow of commitment, to be right by your side for the rest of our lives, because I know our coming together is a blessing!

I want you to know that I love you already and with Jesus, we can overcome any challenge that may come our way.

 

Your future wife.

 

Conclusion

I wrote this letter to my future husband, and at the same time, for every single lady reading this; to know that the journey to the covenant is very important and the wait is always worth it. While we wait for the day we get to say “I do”, let us make a commitment to grow and pray for our future husbands; because when the Ephesians 5 man meets the Proverbs 31 woman, you can bet that marriage will be heaven on earth.

If you feel so lonely you need to know that you are not alone. I am your friend and we can always talk about it.

Until we meet again, which is very soon: I love you!

Your friend and sister,

Onome Omodara

IN LOVE WITH A CHURCH BOY

 

While growing up, I was eager to date a church boy: I felt they would be kind and know how to treat a woman right, but that mindset changed as I grew older. I encountered the bad eggs and was petrified to realize; that some approved sex before marriage.

I have had my share of wrong relationships; the scariest heartbreak I had was from a guy I met in church. After the experience, I made up my mind I was done with church boys. As a matter of fact, I didn’t mind dating an unbeliever: I told myself I would drag him to church, but God had better plans for me. Interestingly, I got to meet a church boy about two years later and I am passionately in love with this man.

This article is not about me. I know there are people like me, who gave up on church boys, and some, who would rather meet a man in a club, than in church. I am not judging your decisions but before you give up on godly men, you need to read this…

THE EPHESIANS 5 MAN

“In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself” (Ephesians 5:28).

The reason a lot of us are dealing with heartbreaks is because, we keep doing things God didn’t ask us to do. God never asked you to date a church boy. It wasn’t written anywhere in the scriptures, that you have to marry a man you meet in church.

The church is like a hospital: some are sick, some are recovering while others have fully recovered. Therefore, anybody can be a church boy, but it takes more than going to church to be an Ephesians 5 man. It took me a while to understand that, when you choose to wait on God, He will give you the best.

The Ephesians 5 man is a rare breed. In simple terms: he is “the kingdom man”. This man doesn’t just go to church: he loves God passionately and is pursuing a relationship with the Lord. This man loves his woman, sees her as the helper for his journey to purpose, pursues and covers her as Christ does.

There is a difference between a nice man and a kind man. Also, there is a difference between a good man and a godly man. The fact that a man is good, does not translate to him being godly. The real difference is that a godly man does not make decisions without consulting the King, and every day, he is pursuing after righteousness and holiness. Interestingly, this man is even asking the father how to love you right. He is not just a random man: he is a gift!

Stop stressing yourself over meeting the right man: hand over your love life to the father and I assure you, that He will make your paths cross. You may not meet him in church, but when you do, you will be grateful you waited; because the Ephesians 5 man, is worth the wait!

At the end of the day, the Ephesians 5 man is a church boy, who loves the Lord and is committed to the growth of the kingdom.

I pray for everyone waiting on the lord for their Ephesians 5 man, and for those searching for their proverbs 31 woman: may the father order your steps, and at the right time, your paths will cross. While you are waiting, keep pursuing God. The best is here already.

Cheers to your beautiful love story!

Onome Omodara

Onomewrites@gmail.com

THE LOVE ADVENTURE WITH SAPELE JACKSON

I was trying to check through Instagram to see what’s happening and all, then my eye caught something. It’s my friend Jackson he is getting married and I was so excited. I could be hopelessly romantic on some occasions and I get so excited when I have to share love stories, it actually proves the faithfulness of God.

I reached out to Jackson and he was more than ready to share his love story. I must appreciate his sincerity and humility to share this story. Love is a very beautiful thing when you find the right one and if there is one thing I have to come to discover is the fact that God writes the best stories.

Do me a favour, grab a bottle of Fanta and let’s go on this adventure together. I can assure you that you are in for a great ride!

 

Onome: let me start by saying a very big thank you for creating time out of your busy schedule to do this. What makes you special as an individual?

Jackson: You are welcome Onome, it’s a big honour. What makes me special? I would say new birth in Christ which has opened me up to a unique identity with Christ and eventually led to divine election and calling.

Onome: hmm, tell us something about you.

Jackson: I’m SAPELE Egwonor Jackson, a Nigerian citizen from Delta state, okpara inland in ethiope-east LGA to be precise. I’m a graduate of Sociology and Anthropology from Nnamdi Azikwe University Awka. I am currently based in Yala LGA of Cross River State, serving as a full-time pastor with Living faith church, Aka winners chapel under the mentorship and fatherhood of Bishop David O. Oyedepo.

Onome: Tell us about your waiting season

Jackson: Early years on campus I began to pray about my life partner.  In my 200level, I made a silent prayer, asking God never to make me get married to a person that will bring dissatisfaction and lack of fulfilment to my life.  I tried a couple of relationship two precisely but they didn’t work out, in all God was busy orchestrating my path I believe.

I decided to pursue purpose, I obeyed the call of God to go into full-time ministry and in my first assignment, I understood the real meaning of help meet. So I will say my waiting season was a period I focused on pursuing God’s divine purpose for my life.  I believe it is purpose first before life partner.  From experience, I discovered it is easier to discover your life partner while pursuing God’s purpose.

Onome: Thank you for that, so how did you meet your wife?

Jackson: As I said, I met her on my first missionary assignment.  The very first day I reported, it was obvious to me that I have found my missing rib.  I met her in church. The very first day I stepped into the church I was posted to serve,  she was the one leading the opening worship,  I couldn’t stop looking……. Onome, you know the rest.

Onome: (laughs) how did you know she was the one?

Jackson: Hmmm, sincerely, it took some time before I finally accepted what my heart desired.  I was trying to heal from the past relationship, I wanted enough time, but God had a better plan for me,  funny enough after few months of praying, seeking counsels, thinking(i thought more) and observing her as a friend, I discovered she’s the exact person I have been praying for right from my campus days.  I had peace, lots of Joy and I was always satisfied and fulfilled talking with her.  As friends, we could talk for several hours.  I just knew and to crown it up, God gave a series of scriptures to back up my convictions.

Onome: How is it like preparing for your wedding?

Jackson: It’s exciting and fun-filled. Going out together for shopping,  and other arrangements.  Though we are doing more of reading marriage books,  to gather adequate and sufficient knowledge for the life journey together.

Onome: What is the place of God in choosing a partner?

Jackson: The place of God is irreplaceable. When God is absent in a believers choice for a life partner, then someone or something else is present. I have always had the notion years ago, that God knows the future better than us.  He knows the internal workings of everyman better than even our parents.  God knows if someone is pretending or not, no man can deceive God, no matter how you think someone is good for a spouse, you will need to seek God’s face for approval and confirmation. Venturing without God’s leading and His backing is an unknown and unsafe journey.

Onome: What’s your advice to singles who are waiting?

Jackson: Your waiting time shouldn’t be wasted time, locate your God-given purpose for living and venture to it as led, that’s the best way to wait.  Adam the first man was on his divine assignment and his wife met him there. Ignore anxiety and rest on God’s promises, the delay is never a denial. It doesn’t take time, it only takes God.

Onome: Thank you for this deep revelation, when is the wedding and I hope we are all invited?

Jackson: Of course everyone is invited if they can come. The wedding takes place on the 16th of March at cross-river.

Onome: Thank you so much for your time.

Jackson: Anytime Onome, it’s a big honour.

 

Conclusion

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding” Proverbs 3: 5 (NKJV).

There is always time for everything and God has it all figured out. All you need to do is trust His timing and leading. Sometimes, the road is lonely and feels so long but you can be so sure God has got you and He is writing your story. Don’t try to steal the pen from Him, be patient because when God aligns you with your partner it is a forever kind of love story.

Congratulations to Jackson and Mercy, we wish them a happy married life!

Trust the father and enjoy the season, I look forward to sharing your love story.

Your friend and sister,

Onome Omodara

LOVE AND ME WITH LIZZY

Hi,

My name is Lizzy and I’m here to tell you a story about what Love means to me and my journey with Love.

Growing up as a child, I never really understood what love meant and Valentine was just one of those days, I didn’t even such a day really existed and even when I knew it meant nothing.

My parents were meant to be my yardstick but from as a child, I  never saw them show themselves any form of love ( let this not surprise you) my parents are African and expressing of love was just not a common thing while I was growing up,  I grew up as a  mean and sad child. At age 10 I left my parents and I grew worse.

I started staying with different people, moving from one family to another some treated me well and some didn’t but still I never really understood what Love meant.

I started dating at age 14 thinking dating someone would help me understand what Love is but then I hated those I dated at some point, it went on and on like that for a very long time.  I got into the University and I hear so many of my friends fantasize about Love, then it occurred to me that love is here and then I said to myself “is this what Love truly is” I went ahead to date someone else, this time I didn’t even stay one week in the relationship as I started to grow pure hatred for him. Then I realized there’s more to love than dating or learning from other people experiences.

Life was going on as usual but some unusual happened to me, I came in contact with the person of Christ and for the first time I felt loved, I felt there was someone that loves me so much in spite of my errors and mistakes but then I still couldn’t reciprocate this love to people there was still a void in me that needs to be filled.

I dated this beautiful soul after my NYSC, with him I almost felt the same way I felt when I met Christ. This guy loved me unconditionally, he loved me with everything but then I still couldn’t reciprocate the love and at some point, I grew so much hatred for Him.

Having gone through all of these, I felt really devastated and confused.  I became really bothered about myself,  I wanted to know what really went wrong and then a question popped up in my heart “Christ loves you,  people love you but do you love yourself? ” so I was quick to respond why not,  I love myself why wouldn’t I?  Really why wouldn’t I?  Then I stopped to think well, I asked myself some basic questions and then I found out I never really loved myself.

I grew up never knowing who I really am, my identity was messed up, I lied to myself as often as I can remember. I crave for people’s opinions about me, I crave for their love but then I never loved myself. I felt I wasn’t good enough, I felt dead to myself.

Now I know what really went wrong, I couldn’t love others as much cause I never loved “ME”. I couldn’t stay in a relationship for so long because I never loved myself,  I jumped from relationship to another seeking for someone to fill the space I was meant to fill myself. I never felt happy being single because I never loved me, I couldn’t even stay alone because I felt it was someone’s duty to make me feel loved.

I know what the problem was, and remember you can only provide a solution to a problem you know of.  I started paying much more attention to who I really am,  I started channelling love to myself.  Yes, I tell myself I’m just good enough, I tell myself the best thing that is to be told. I remind myself each day about the love of God for me and it has kept me going.

It’s Valentine and I know you feel lonely, there’s no one to take you out. You feel jealous of friends that you know would definitely receive wonderful lots of valentine presents. If you love yourself I’m sure you wouldn’t feel strange staying alone on valentine and buying yourself a beautiful gift.

No one would ever love you more than you love yourself, you have to see yourself as the best to make someone find the best in you. Come to think of it Valentine is not just about boo and bae, it’s beyond what we find ourselves doing in this generation.

Valentine is a day to impact lives, a day to make people understand that they must first love themselves genuinely before they can love others and before someone can find them worthy of love.

Rather than wait for someone to love you, buy you a present or take you out. Love yourself, take yourself out, and give yourself that best treat you think you deserve. Enjoy your own company!

Be happy being single and if you are not single be sure not to make your happiness dependent on the other person.

I have promised myself to enjoy my day and have fun being by myself and I am content this way until God sends the right one.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Yours

,Lizzy!

 

A LETTER TO THE SINGLE AND BROKEN HEARTED

 

Dearest one,

It’s another Valentine and love is in the air. If you asked me about two or three years ago what Valentine meant I would probably tell you it’s that day people decide to be stupid. I hated Valentine, it’s one of the days I would wake up miserable and angry because I knew I was going to see a lot of ladies smile and blush over their rose flowers and perfumes but here I was; single, miserable, broken-hearted and lonely.

Trust me when I tell you I know how it feels to wake up in the morning with nobody sending a love message of how you rock their world, the feeling of getting a phone call from your best friend that her boo just proposed. How do you describe that feeling of emptiness that just envelopes you when you retire to your bed with no gift, not even a bottle of Fanta.

I have been where you are, I hated Valentine until last year when something changed. You think I found a man? I’m sorry but your guess is so wrong. No man had found me up until that time but I had come to understand what love really meant.

April 2017 the Lord called me to step into a new realm and that was a big step, you have heard me say it several times. I ditched other relationships and focused on his love for me, the truth is, I can’t boast of my love for him, I can only boast of his love for me.

This journey of singleness has opened my eyes to who I really am, I have been able to come to a place of accepting my personality and embrace my uniqueness. That is why I can gladly love this person I am growing to be and at the same time be able to accept love.

I wish I could tell you it was an easy ride but honestly, there were days I wanted to break down and just hop into the arms of the next man that comes my way but today I can tell you that the wait is always worth it.

I know you are broken hearted, you are smiling and laughing with everyone but deep within you are broken, wounded and hurt. You can’t understand why someone you loved passionately would decide to hurt you. You don’t even know how to love anymore but I need you to see the brighter days ahead because soon you will rejoice.

I have seen God rewrite stories and turn things around but you need to be content with who you are, accept your person. The truth is, you are the one who decides your joy, and until you love yourself nobody will love you rightly.

My life feels like a fairy tale sometimes and I can tell you that your dream relationship is very possible. Trust the process and allow the father to write your story. I have seen write my story in a way that sounds like a fairy tale, I wake up every day as a grateful child, one the father loves exceptionally! My story is one that tells you that God is the best writer of love stories!

I know the next fear is but how do I love again when I find the right one. This fear was in my face every day, I thought I had forgotten how to love, I thought I was going to mess things up so I tried to be perfect but the one God has for you will help you, the one God has for you will not leave you hanging. The one God has for you will be an expression of the father’s love.

Today, love yourself, treat yourself right. Get yourself a gift and appreciate where you are right now and embrace the father’s love.

God is writing the perfect love story for you don’t steal the pen with impatience.

You are worth loving!

You are worth chasing!

Happy Valentine’s Day sweetie.

Your friend and sister,

Onome Omodara

Read also: Single and Satisfied

THE JOURNEY TO FOREVER WITH TEE

 

Getting a bride for an interview just two weeks to her wedding is not quite easy but Tee is just a lady whose heart is large and I couldn’t be happier when she told me she is willing to share her story. I had a meeting Tee in 2016, she came to say hi and we were discussing about relationships. She was still very single and I could remember she told me she was going to allow God have the final say in her love life and looking back at that statement she lived to her words. Her story is one of patience, absolute trust in God and of course love.

Tee’s wedding comes up on the 8th of December and interviewing her was not just fun there were a lot of great lessons to pick from her love story. She is on the journey to forever and in this interview she talks about her waiting and of course how she met her darling husband to be.

Do me a favour get a bottle of cold Fanta and enjoy this story because you are in for a great ride!

 

Onome: Let me start by saying thank you for your time. My first question is this; what makes you special as an individual?

Tee: Everyone is uniquely created by God and each of us has what makes us special but for me I will say my temperament makes me special because that is who God has made me to be. My attitude, behavior, reaction, action, responses and all makes me unique and special in my own way.

Onome: what was your waiting season like? How did you spend it?

Tee: Hmmm….. That’s a very long story but I will try to make it as brief as possible. I have tried a lot of relationships but none worked. I can’t start saying in details but God thought me a lot of lessons alongside.

The fact remains this; putting God first will enable one make the right decision at all times. Knowing God early and relating with Him sincerely will also help in making the right choices.

It’s not fun trying relationships because it hurts the heart deeply most times, getting it right from the early stage is the best thing that can ever happen to a lady in terms of relationship but at the same time God has a way of making all things work together for good. My waiting season was filled with lessons and at the same time I got to walk intimately with God.

Onome: How did you meet your husband?

Tee: I met him when I was serving, I had a friend serving in his office, he happens to be my friend’s direct boss. I went visiting my friend on two different occasions so he met me through my friend. I didn’t know anything was happening until he called me himself.

Onome: How did you know he was the one?

Tee: The first day we spoke, I felt a connection and relief in my spirit. We started talking at length from the first day we spoke and it was quite unusual of me to get acquainted with a stranger at the first instance. I was feeling strange though but I believed my spirit won’t mislead me because I wasn’t desperate and wasn’t expecting anyone at that period. I kept getting connected to him even before he proposed but I held my peace because I tired avoiding the flesh pushing me to give too much attention. Gradually we got in to ourselves by talking about past and present experiences. His love for God confirmed he was the right person. We were not shy to express our love for God. We shared the word together, we prayed together, we read books together even before he proposed.

The day he made his intentions known, I tried playing games of the heart even though I had known ahead of time… I finally gave him a yes.  We decided to make it work. He imbibed some lessons and ensured we pray every morning and night. When issues come up, we try rectifying it daily because we know nothing must hinder the place of prayer daily.

Onome: How long did you two date?

Tee: A year and six months

Onome: How is it like preparing for the wedding ceremony?

Tee: Well… Based on my personality, I like putting things in place early enough then resting afterwards. After the church gave a date, we sorted counseling almost immediately, we went shopping ahead because we were not sure of full availability afterwards. Fortunately, it favoured us because I got so involved in school activities that I hardly had time for myself. The saving grace was that I was prepared way ahead of time and just like the watch word of boy’s scout ‘Be prepared’, I was and I’m still very prepared.

Getting the wedding gown, native attire, family preparations and all wasn’t easy but the fact that we played our role early because I was moving made it easier. Even till last Wednesday in November I was still battling with school activities.  I wondered what could have happened if all wasn’t worked on early. By early November everything was set to the glory of God.

In summary, preparation for wedding is indeed fun… There is this special feeling that comes with it especially when you go shopping and the marketers ask if it’s for wedding and you smile… Those prayers from every side is a big part of the preparation. It keeps us going.

Onome: Wow. That’s a big lesson to learn. What is the place of God in choosing a partner?

Tee: I tried making all relationships I had work but none worked out because I was concerned about my effort and I left God at the initial stage of those relationships, I only involved Him in the middle and it didn’t work out. But when I decided to give Him my all, the connection came from where I least expected. Imagine meeting your husband when you went to spend some time with your male friend…’no strings attached though’.  An average guy could have felt I came seeing my boyfriend or I’m a flirt or something but because God was involved, there were no assumptions. My friend wanted to redeploy when he was posted there but till date he keeps saying he went to serve there because of me.  He was used by God to make us meet and I can say God actually aligned us together. God was involved because He worked it out in a mysterious way and let me say this God is a very important factor when choosing a partner, He knows you and knows what is best for you.

Onome: .Hmmm… so what is your advice to single ladies waiting?

Tee: Giving it all to God is the best because we can never force what God is not involved in to work out. We should not tell God we can handle our relationships on our own. We should not live in our pasts when God has forgiven us already.

Making God the foundation of our relationships will help stabilize the relationship even when storms of life come in. Choosing right helps live heaven on earth. Let’s also endeavor to read books, it helps us build capacity. Every relationship is unique in its own way, we should not make anyone’s relationship a standard.

Onome: Thank you so much for your time, I know it’s a big sacrifice. We really appreciate you. Once again, Congratulations ma’am.

Tee: It’s a big honour Onome, thank you for having me.

CONCLUSION

“Delight yourself also in the Lord and He shall give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37: 4) NKJV

Sometimes we try to force God into relationships we never started with Him and then it becomes so messy, a good relationship starts with God. Here is to all the singles who are tired of waiting, the ones who are frustrated and angry I hope this story encourages you that God has the best for you and when He aligns you with your partner it is a forever kind of story.

Cheer up and watch grant the desires of your heart while you delight yourself in Him. Once again, a big congratulations to Tee and her husband we wish them God’s blessing as they begin the journey to forever.

Hold on and trust God, I look forward to sharing your story.

Related: The will of God in your love life

 

Your friend,

Onome Omodara

 

 

 

THE BROKEN EDGE

 

Hi guys,

Let me tell you a story, one that is short and also interesting.

I met a young, talented, gifted and passionate writer sometimes in September. The aura and the ambience she portrayed carried grace, this is not some fantasy but reading through her poetry I knew right there that the world deserved to meet this beautiful writer.

She called me one evening and said to me “I want to participate in the okadabooks campus writing challenge” I couldn’t help but dance my shaku shaku dance because I knew that this is a step to greatness. She wrote the story and no flattery I was amazed at the beauty of the story.

The broken edge has five short chapters, it is the story of a young lady who was broken, cracked, damaged and heartbroken. If you are an emotional somebody like me, there is a high chance that this story will bring you to tears.

Let me leave the story, the broken edge made it to the top 150 stories for the competition and when I heard the news I danced like a little girl who just got a bowl of ice-cream. We really need your help to bring her to the top. We need your vote!

In her words she said

“Minimum of two times a week, eight times in a month, ninety-six times a year, there is always a pop-up news on rape in Nigeria(85% involving the girl-child).

But not all rape cases even make it to the news

THE BROKEN EDGE is a book that mirrors the life of a victim.

I,Bada Oluwatimileyin,A 200level student of the Department of Chemistry, University of Ibadan, Ibadan, Nigeria, wrote this short story as an entry for the okadabooks campus writing challenge

And I need your vote to help me win the #audiencefavorite category”

See ehn, this is our book and we need to vote for this story! Timileyin has done a great job and she deserves to win this. Voting is quite simple, it will just take some minutes of your time.

HOW TO VOTE

Click Here it takes you directly to the page for voting

Sign up and create an account (you have to create an account to vote)

Search for “the broken edge” click on it

You will find the link Vote just click on vote and that is all!

Finally, download the book and read it is a story that will be worth your time.

 

I know I can count on your votes fam, please help us vote. Once you vote drop your comment and I will personally appreciate you. I might even have a small gift for you!

Thank you!!!!!!

Cheers!

Yours,

Onome Omodara

 

LOVE BEYOND WORDS BY TEMIDAYO OGUNLEYE

Love! Love! Love!

You know that word right? It’s so popular and yet terribly abused. Love on its own is beautiful but really it seems we still don’t understand what real love means but the real meaning of Love is found in God. How do we describe a man who came to pay the sacrifices for what he didn’t do, he actually died to set us free, what kind of love is that? I still can’t fathom that love till date.

Defining love is actually defining God, God is love and Love is God and we can never fully understand and know how to Love until we know God. It’s really not my job to do that today but I’ve got someone who can perfectly describe what love means, this lady has encountered this love so divine and I can say she is qualified to describe this love that is beyond words.

Temidayo wrote a book titled ‘Love beyond words’ it’s a book filled with poetic lines that describes love in simple yet enriching words. Yes, it’s your baby girl that wrote the foreword so I endorse this book. What are you waiting for?

Kindly download your copy here

Don’t forget to drop your comments after reading.

I love you!

Yours,

Onome Omodara

THIS LOVE THING: UNBROKEN 2018

 

 

Leticia was your definition of beauty with a very straight figure – slim and alluring, her legs so long and attractive, she has a stunning beauty and with her great fashion sense she could get heads turning.  It wasn’t just about beauty she is very intelligent too which explains her growth in the banking sector she was employed as a customer care representative but in three years she became a branch manager. As for love Leticia was not so lucky in that department so she embraced her career and hoped that one day her turn would come. Her mother never stopped reminding her that marriage is very important.

Jimi was a young entrepreneur with so much strength, he is very passionate about his business and it’s not surprising his wealth is multiplying daily. This particular day he woke up very angry his accountant had complained about a particular sum of money he was supposed to send into the company’s account. He made the transfer using his token, he was debited but the money was not received in the company’s account, it’s been five days.

He hated visiting the bank but he had to go as the money was urgent, he met with the customer care representative who told him it would take seven (7) working days this got him angry and he insisted on speaking with the branch manager.

He was ushered into Leticia’s office, something about her caught his attention. Was it her calmness or her patience or her genuine concern? He couldn’t place it but he knew he had to get close to her. They exchanged contacts and they became friends.

Six months later, they started dating and they were so in love. There was a particular they decided to grab some groceries at the nearest supermarket it was there Leticia saw her old friend Matthew. She was excited when she saw him, he left the country in their third year in the university, and she hugged him and introduced him to Jimi. She chatted with him for a while and went back to Jimi. On Jimi’s end he was angry why would she hug another guy and even chat with him. This is not the first time Leticia had had to greet a male friend and Jimi would be angry but this time around he was mad. Immediately they got back to the car he slapped her. He claimed she disrespected him by hugging another man.

Leticia made up her mind to break up with him but he came back begging and because she loved him she forgave him. Two months later they got married and the monster in Jimi came alive, he beat her up at any slight provocation, he made her resign from her job and Leticia became a shadow of herself. If only someone had told her about love and marriage, if only she knew what it takes to get a good man she would not be deceived by that fake smile and all the fancy gifts. She was hoping her divorce would work out but until then the universe was definitely against her.

IF WE KNOW BETTER WE WILL DO BETTER

Don’t be like Leticia, I’ve meant singles whose requirement for marriage baffles me. As long as the man has enough money character is a small thing or as long as she is pretty character is minimal. Who gave you that analogy? Marriage is real work and it takes beyond beauty and even love to have a good home. Divorce rate keeps getting higher and I wonder why? A lot of people are married and they are not happy everyday feels like hell and I discover one major reason and the bible has said it all. Hosea 4:6a says “My people perish for lack of Knowledge”. KNOWLEDGE is very important. Marriage is not a place you enter into with assumed knowledge you really need to know.

This is why I’m inviting you for UNBROKEN CONFRENCE 2018 at the Harvesters International Christian Centre Lekki. Unbroken is the annual singles and married conference of the Harvesters church, the vision was birthed 3 years ago to help change lives and cause fulfillment in relationships. With the increasing rates of divorce and separations, dysfunctional homes, marital and relationship unfulfilment, broken relationships and emotionally bruised people, a swift and effective aid must come to the institution of marriage and relationships.

Since its debut, UNBROKEN has significantly contributed to increasingly successful relationships, happier marriages, building Godly homes and UNBROKEN 2018 promises to be even richer as seemingly complex topics will be unraveled.

 

For singles the issues to be treated are:

Why am I sill single?
Why bad girls get good guys?
Identifying the right mate.
Spotting time-wasters.
Dealing with hurts and heartbreaks

 

Married people are left out either as these issues will be dissected:

Sex in marriage.
Can my marriage still work?
Improving intimacy.
How to make your partner happy.
Navigating through the first 5 years of marriage.
Dealing with extra-marital affairs.
Parenting in a tech-driven world.

The line of speakers are amazing. We have Ezekiel Atang, Hassani Pettiford, Mowumi Idowu and Bolaji Idowu.

The venue is at Harvesters International Christian Centre Lekki, Block 94, Plot 22 Providence street (beside VFS) 2nd Round about Lekki Phase 1 Lagos. The date is September 26th -30th 2018.

SEPT 26th, Time: 6pm
SEPT 27th, Time: 6pm
SEPT 28th, Time: 6pm
SEPT 29th, Time: 10am
SEPT 30th, Time: 7:10am, 8:15am, 10am, 11:45am

You can’t afford to miss it in marriage because marriage is too long to endure. Marriage is a journey of continuous learning. Don’t miss unbroken for anything! I look forward to seeing you

 

 

 

 

LETTER TO MY 23 YEAR OLD SELF

 

“Promise me, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the time is right.” Songs of Solomon 8:4 (NLT).

 

I celebrated my birthday last week and it took me down memory lane, I realized I made some mistakes and I have no regrets but it is expedient that the world understands that there is always a better way and some mistakes are better avoided.

 

I hope this letter encourages that single person who is tired of waiting and it helps that person who keeps trying to find love on his own terms, I’m not asking you to give up on love I’m only asking to try the best method! Before you give up read this:

 

My Dearest Onome,

Baby girl, I can see that you are trying. You have jumped from one boyfriend to another, moved from one situationship to another relationship searching for what is not lost. You wonder if God is with you. He set you up with some to help them, he used you for them but yet none is the answer. You have wondered where he is. Not one of these men is qualified to help you fulfill the assignment. He is not the one.

All your friends are in serious relationships they are flaunting their relationships on social media, you prayed for them and they are happy but you ask where your own Isaac is? You met a new guy some months ago he is handsome and classy what if he is the one? no my dear he is not the one.

You have known this one for a long while he has been on and off but you think this time around he is here to stay you gladly tell your friends about him, you are waiting for the day he will ask you out but he is yet to say anything. He keeps telling you he loves you but he is not proving it, it became worse when he forgot your birthday but you forgave him after all you love him but on his birthday you went all out flaunting him on social media stop wasting your time my darling he is not the one.

Then you met another you know he is not the one but you can’t afford to be single you think singleness is a life of loneliness but what you don’t understand is that it is a life of surrender. Every time the thought of him leaving you comes to your head you get panic attacks, you prayed that God should make him the one but you know you are not of the same passion. I know he loves God but He is not assigned to you I know it hurts but he is not the one.

Stop trying to do it without God, stop forcing the father into relationships he never ordained. Little did you know that all the father needs from you is total trust. Give him the pen of your love life and let Him write the best story with it.

Little did you know that all the efforts you are putting in getting people to see you or men to like you, God wants you to invest in Him. He wants you to seek him with the whole of your heart and he in turn will bless you with the desires of your heart.

Little did you know that years from now you will meet your man. This man will love you passionately, he will gladly show you off, he will be God’s gift to you. Do you know that he will love you with all his might and apologize deeply when he is wrong? Do you know this man will lead you back to the father? He will pray for you and with you. Do you know that He will love you like Christ loves the church? Do you know he will not be shy to tell everyone you are his? Do you know he will treat you like a queen that you are? Do you know together you will fulfill purpose and serve the father forever?

Do you know that it’s possible to have undeniable peace in a relationship?  Do you know that the validation you think you can get from another man can ONLY come from God?

Baby girl, you have tried. Now rest. You are smart and beautiful, you don’t need any man’s validation, you are a complete being. you deserve to be loved and valued, you deserve to be happy.  stop doing it your own way. rest in the father’s love. Love who you are and the woman you are becoming. Be patient love will find you at the right time.

Enjoy singleness and be deeply rooted in the father. This man is worth waiting for so while you wait be prepared.

Your big sister,

Onomewrites.

 

CONCLUSION

I know waiting is tough if you ask me I have a lot of stories to tell but I’m a testimony that nothing is wrong with being satisfied in your singleness. Nothing is wrong with you chasing the father. Stop trying to seek validation from men, you are complete in Christ. Stop chasing love let your heart find rest in the father’s love! The wait is always worth it because the right one will make you forget all the pains.

I love you!

Your friend and sister,

Omodara Onome