Category: Love & Relationships

WRITERS’ JOURNAL

THE CHRONICLES OF A PREACHER’S KID

NB: We will use PK for Preacher’s Kid for the purpose of this work.

As a young girl, I spent a lot of time questioning my birth. One major question that readily comes to mind was “why on earth was I a PK?”

As a PK you obviously are not at liberty to do everything you want you want to do. You must be in church, you must recite memory verses, you must be the good “boy or girl” and to make it funnier, everybody expects a perfect, pure unadulterated life from you. #Sigh!

My life was monitored. It felt like I would never have a normal life.I just wanted to be FREE!

MY ADVENTURES

Years passed and i fast approached the teenage years.  At the time, the new cool was fashion for me and of course i wanna feel among. Do what my friends do and all but then remember? I am a PK. That really served as huge stumbling blocks to living the life. The first time i tried something funny as to fashion, I was in junior secondary school and my mum had travelled for a women’s conference as it was the norm. I went into her room, took her bible marker and painted my nails. Oh Gosh!  it was a Friday evening so I had to be in church for rehearsals. After rehearsals, I greeted a woman in my church and the first thing she noticed was that I had painted my nails. She just shouted “so you have  joined them! Have you forgotten that you are a daughter of an ordained minister?”  Immediately, I knew there’s no Jupiter that’d stop my Mum from knowing.  But it was just a Bible marker I thought. My mum got back and as i was expecting, she got to know and she scolded me.

Being a predominant sanguine, it is only expected of me to talk a lot but because I am a PK,  I dare not talk really freely because before I land, I’d hear “and you call yourself the daughter of a Pastor “. Having a boyfriend?  I dare not even dare to imagine daring that.  That would mean Deep trouble for me.

I could remember getting so angry at one of my friend when she told me “even you? and you call yourself a pastor’s daughter o”, I just screamed and told her “my parents’ faith will not take me to heaven, leave me alone”.  I want to be corrected but not because I was a pastor’s daughter, I wanted people to see and relate with me just as I am.

I really wondered “where did I get it all wrong?” “Why was I born a preacher’s daughter?” But as I grew, I knew better.

What makes a PK Special?

Everybody in church naturally loves hanging around the pastor’s children. A friend of mine who was also a PK was telling me how a lot of girls kept writing him letters wanting to be his girlfriend. Chai!  Ladies!!!  I’ve seen a lot of ladies always trying to help the pastor’s wife in the kitchen. There is this feeling of “mummy must know me”. Everybody wants to hang around people who are in places of honour and as far as the church is concerned the pastor is the one in that place of honour.

People fail to realise that Pastors are imperfect humans and same goes with their Children. It is a key attribute of humans to make mistakes. You hold no right to judge anyone.

The society place a lot of demand on these children beyond what they can take. Subjecting them to a life of pretense, living a perpetual lie. They keep living in the shadows of the many demands placed on them.  They never truly live. For the unlucky ones, it becomes too late for them and they grow up wanting to explore all the life that were denied of them  and because they are ignorant and gullible, they fall Victims. They go wild.

Dear Preacher, am I insinuating that you leave your Children to go wild?  GOD FORBID! Please, understand that what it takes to be a parent in 2017 is far different from what it takes to be a parent in your time. You can’t afford the rare error of raising your Children the way you were raised.  BLEND WITH THE TREND IN THE LORD. 

 

A QUICK ONE FOR ME FELLOW PKs

Dear PK,

I know you might be frustrated because everybody wants you to live a perfect life.

I know you might think ink nobody understands but hey, you’re so so unique.

Please, know that being a PK is a rare privilege.

In case you don’t know, you are a reflection of your parents’ ministry

Your life should reflect their ministry

You should live an exemplary life

Responsibilities are on you

Your life should not be the exact opposite of what your father or mother preaches

I know people demand what you think you can’t afford from you

Make your parents proud

Appreciate who you are and shine brighter

I know there are days they get so busy trying to fix other people and they don’t have time for you

Don’t feel bad you are more important to them

Don’t live a casual life you are not an ordinary child!

Don’t ever live to please men

You can never please men

Live a purposeful life!

 

CONCLUSION

We are all imperfect humans.  Judging and criticising people do more worse than good. Let us all learn to correct in love. Leadership is a place of responsibility. There is no leader that actually desires to fail in the place of leadership. Life only happens. Let us all cultivate the habit of encouraging our leaders. Be emphatic.  Show sincere love.

FINALLY, have you said a word of prayer for your Pastor and Leaders today?

 

 

I am Omodara Oluwabunmi Onome.

Onomewrites@gmail.com

 

If this blesses you, kindly share and we will appreciate your honest feedback.

THANK YOU!

YOURS!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

“With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability one can build a better world” – Dalai Lam
As a young girl I battled with a low self-esteem for a very long while, I felt I was not wanted I thought I was not beautiful enough and it naturally affected the way people were relating with me. I was bullied and treated anyhow by friends when I was younger because I thought I was nobody.
The English Dictionary defines Self-worth as “The value one assigns to oneself or one’s ability in self-assessment. It is the value you place on yourself; your self-worth defines who you are.

Low self-esteem is capable of making you feel ordinary it’s able to make you feel less, I was miserable till I found my self-worth until I found who I was people never valued me. The point is you will always be treated the way you treat yourself.

People’s opinion about you should never reduce your self-worth nobody has a right over you, the truth is you owe yourself the best and nobody should make you feel less not your parents, not your siblings not even your spouse.

Your self-worth comes from you, if you ever had to wonder why you are being treated like nobody why you are not valued then it’s high time you built your self-confidence, it’s time to increase your self-worth.

“We cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have first proven acceptable to ourselves (Malcolm X)”. The world sees you the way you see yourself when you are look at the mirror every morning let me ask you who do you see? If you see a great man the world will see a great man and if you see otherwise that is exactly what the world will see.
A lot of people’s self-worth reduces when challenges come knocking on their door or after they have failed. Just because you have failed has not made you a failure. Failure is just a stepping stone to your greatness it should increase your self-worth and not reduce it because you are not ordinary.
Self-worth boosts your self-confidence when you know what you worth nobody can treat like you are nothing, when you know your worth then it helps you to know that you can do anything to the best of your ability. You are so intelligent and unique but you need to stand up and find your worth.

Young lady if you know your worth no man can treat like you are a piece of rag and still expect you to be with him and young man if you also know your worth no woman should treat you like you are a toy that she’s managing. You are not meant to be pitied and managed.
You are a big deal and you are very important so don’t allow mistakes, inabilities and failure keep you in bondage find what you makes you unique and be who you are designed to be.

SELF-LOVE
“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world (Lucille Ball)”. Falling in love is very important if you want others to love you then you need to start loving yourself. Self-love will boost your self-worth. Until I loved who I was nobody valued me and every day I’ve never stopped loving the beautiful lady I see in the mirror. Make it a habit to say sweet things to yourself, tell yourself you are a big deal and I bet your self-worth and value will keep increasing.
It does not matter where you are now don’t allow the failures and mistakes of your past define who you are or who you will be. Stand up and raise your head up high because you are a very important person and you’ve got a great future.

Don’t suffer in silence if you ever need a friend to talk to just send a mail to Onomewrites@gmail.com and let’s talk it out, you don’t need to cry alone you are so special.

See you at the top.
I love you and I believe in you.

Omodara Onome
Relationship and Life coach.

​

 “With realization of one’s own potential and self-confidence in one’s ability one can build a better world” – Dalai Lam

As a young girl I battled with a low self-esteem for a very long while, I felt I was not wanted I thought I was not beautiful enough and it naturally affected the way people were relating with me.  I was bullied and treated anyhow by friends when I was younger because I thought I was nobody.

The English Dictionary defines Self-worth as “The value one assigns to oneself or one’s ability in self-assessment. It is the value you place on yourself; your self-worth defines who you are.

Low self-esteem is capable of making you feel ordinary it’s able to make you feel less, I was miserable till I found my self-worth until I found who I was people never valued me. The point is you will always be treated the way you treat yourself.

People’s opinion about you should never reduce your self-worth nobody has a right over you, the truth is you owe yourself the best and nobody should make you feel less not your parents, not your siblings not even your spouse. 

Your self-worth comes from you, if you ever had to wonder why you are being treated like nobody why you are not valued then it’s high time you built your self-confidence, it’s time to increase your self-worth.

“We cannot think of being acceptable to others until we have first proven acceptable to ourselves (Malcolm X)”. The world sees you the way you see yourself when you are look at the mirror every morning let me ask you who do you see? If you see a great man the world will see a great man and if you see otherwise that is exactly what the world will see.

A lot of people’s self-worth reduces when challenges come knocking on their door or after they have failed. Just because you have failed has not made you a failure. Failure is just a stepping stone to your greatness it should increase your self-worth and not reduce it because you are not ordinary.

Self-worth boosts your self-confidence when you know what you worth nobody can treat like you are nothing, when you know your worth then it helps you to know that you can do anything to the best of your ability. You are so intelligent and unique but you need to stand up and find your worth.

Young lady if you know your worth no man can treat like you are a piece of rag and still expect you to be with him and young man if you also know your worth no woman should treat you like you are a toy that she’s managing. You are not meant to be pitied and managed.

You are a big deal and you are very important so don’t allow mistakes, inabilities and failure keep you in bondage find what you makes you unique and be who you are designed to be.

SELF-LOVE

“Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world (Lucille Ball)”. Falling in love is very important if you want others to love you then you need to start loving yourself. Self-love will boost your self-worth. Until I loved who I was nobody valued me and every day I’ve never stopped loving the beautiful lady I see in the mirror. Make it a habit to say sweet things to yourself, tell yourself you are a big deal and I bet your self-worth and value will keep increasing.

It does not matter where you are now don’t allow the failures and mistakes of your past define who you are or who you will be. Stand up and raise your head up high because you are a very important person and you’ve got a great future.

Don’t suffer in silence if you ever need a friend to talk to just send a mail to Onomewrites@gmail.com and let’s talk it out, you don’t need to cry alone you are so special.

See you at the top.

I love you and I believe in you.

Omodara Onome

Relationship and Life coach.