I know that feeling, the feeling of anger, rejection, hurts and pains what made it more painful is the fact that nobody understands not even the people you call friends each time you shed those innocent tears they tell you “You need to get over it and move on you are not the first” some are even nicer they hold you and tell you “Cheer up its going to be fine” but those harsh or sweet words are not just enough to make you feel better you are in serious pain you are hurt not just by anybody but by the one you loved and trusted the most.
I’ve got news for you, I’ve been there and I totally understand, I feel what you are going through yes I’ve been there, I’ve been rejected, abused, used, disappointed and betrayed by the ones I trusted, the ones I gave all my life, I relied on them for support some of them walked out on me without saying goodbye I kept asking myself “where did I miss it, what was my fault?” so you can trust me when I tell you I know exactly how it feels, my heart was ripped into two I was broken and I was hurt, I can’t count the number of times I had to wet my pillow, I used to wonder if there was a God up there nobody understood, I was living in pains for years I was scared of getting close to people I thought everybody I met wanted to hurt me. I could remember the day my uncle told me I was sick for crying over a break up, I could remember a lot of people telling me it was my fault that he walked out, I cannot tell you all I’ve been through, at a point I felt life was not worth living I knew I had talents I knew I had potentials but I was too clouded by pains to see a brighter side of me for years I was living in my shadows I was too scared of coming out, I felt nobody wanted me I heard a lot of motivational talks but it just couldn’t heal me but at a point I was tired of living in pains, I wanted to smile again, I had to make a deliberate effort to come out.
What exactly do you do when the one you love let you down? when people you trust disappoints when your best friends becomes enemies? How do you deal with hurts and pains?
Firstly, don’t ever play the blame game on yourself, don’t blame yourself because it happened, don’t feel bad for yourself because it didn’t work out we are humans we all make mistakes learn from your mistakes but don’t blame yourself, stop feeling guilty stop saying “If I had done this” if someone walks out on you it’s just because it was never meant to be sometimes disappointments is God’s way of preventing you from errors and troubles.
Secondly, forgive that person, I know it sounds crazy you want to say “I’m not sure you understand” I understand, unforgiveness in your heart is hurting you and not the person who hurt you, the person who hurt you is probably sleeping peacefully and you are up all night crying can you see it’s not worth it forgive them so that you can move on.
Thirdly, don’t ever think going into another relationship will help soothe your pain sweetheart you are wrong, it’s never going to help you, you will only end up punishing an innocent soul for the sins of another, give yourself time to heal.
Fourthly, forgive yourself don’t be deceived its really okay to cry the problem is when you cry for too long and you wallow in it, cry your heart out let out the pain, if screaming would make you feel better scream but when you are done crying get up, forgive yourself and move on see the brighter side and become a better person, there is a right person out there for you, forgive yourself and be strong.
Finally and most importantly, allow God to heal you no other person feels your pain like He does, tell Him exactly how you feel, God is not just the provider of material things He heals heart and He gives us peace real peace that surpasses all understanding. I can assure you that His arms are wide open to hold you and wipe your tears and He is ready to heal you and give you a heart to love again.
Sweetheart, we are all humans and we make mistakes forgive yourself, forgive the person that hurt you, you will look back someday and thank God because all the heartbreaks, the pains, the disappointment will make you a better person learn that lesson you need to learn and moves on.
If God could fix me and clean up my mess then He will do much more for you because today I’m grateful for all the pains because they made me better and wiser, you’ve got to trust God and let Him help you.
You are strong and you are special
A friend who understands.